The holidays bring sparkling lights, familiar songs, and warm gatherings—but they can also introduce a level of stress and anxiety as the season gets busier and busier. Between packed schedules, family dynamics, and high expectations, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. The good news? With a few intentional actions, you can find calm amidst the holiday chaos.
Here are some practical tips to help you navigate the season with a bit more ease:
Set Boundaries with Care
The holidays often involve family gatherings, which can bring up old family dynamics, past hurts, or sensitive topics. Setting gentle but clear boundaries can help you manage these situations better.
Example: If politics or family history is a touchy subject, consider using a go-to phrase to politely steer the conversation away. Try: “I’d rather not go into that right now. How about we focus on the fun stuff?”
Action: Identify your top three conversational boundaries in advance. If you feel a subject coming up, have a phrase ready to redirect or politely excuse yourself to refresh your drink or check in with another guest.
Create a Self-Care Plan
With so much energy going towards giving and connecting with others, it’s easy to overlook your own needs. A self-care plan helps you prioritize your own mental and emotional rest.
Example: If you know you’ll have busy days ahead, plan a short “self-care hour” each evening to unwind. This could be a warm bath, journaling, or simply watching a favourite show.
Action: Schedule 15–30 minutes daily as “me time.” Block it on your calendar, just like you would any other holiday event, and treat it as a non-negotiable appointment with yourself.
Manage Expectations and Avoid Perfectionism
We often feel pressure to create a “perfect” holiday experience, but letting go of this need can be incredibly freeing.
Example: Maybe the cookies aren’t Pinterest-perfect, or the dinner table isn’t as elaborate as last year. Focus on what really matters: enjoying time with loved ones. People rarely remember perfection, but they’ll cherish moments of laughter and connection!
Action: Write down the three things that genuinely make the holiday feel meaningful to you. Maybe it’s playing games, sharing a meal, or watching a movie together. Keep this list in mind when deciding what to prioritize in the craziness of the season.
Budget for Your Finances and Energy
The holidays can strain finances with gifts, travel, and extra activities. At the same time, your energy reserves can quickly drain with too many commitments. Setting realistic budgets for both can reduce stress.
Example: Set a spending cap for each person on your gift list and explore thoughtful, budget-friendly alternatives, like handmade gifts, homemade treats, or “experience” gifts like a coupon for a shared activity.
Action: Make a list of all holiday expenses and assign a budget to each category, like gifts, meals, travel, and outings. Use the same approach for your energy—create a list of events and decide which are essential and which you could skip if you feel too drained to attend.
Practice Mindfulness to Stay Present
Mindfulness can be an anchor. Taking just a few moments throughout the day to center yourself can reduce stress significantly.
Example: Before starting any holiday activity, take three deep breaths. Notice the sounds, sights, and scents around you, and gently bring your focus to the present moment.
Action: Set a small daily reminder on your phone to pause and breathe deeply. This “mindfulness moment” can be especially grounding if it happens before a busy part of your day, helping you feel more in control and less reactive.
Let Go of “Shoulds” and Embrace Flexibility
Holidays often bring a lot of “should” statements: “We should host,” “I should attend,” or “It should be like last year.” Giving yourself permission to let go of these “shoulds” can lift a heavy weight.
Example: If hosting a big holiday dinner feels too stressful, consider a smaller gathering, or even a potluck-style meal where guests bring a dish. You don’t need to do it all.
Action: Make a list of all the things you feel like you “should” do this holiday season. Then go through and ask yourself if these are truly essential. Are they rooted in pressure or aligned with your values? Keep only those that bring genuine joy or meaning.
Reach Out for Support When Needed
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember that you don’t have to go through it alone. The holiday season can heighten emotions, and sometimes talking things through can bring relief and clarity.
Example: If you’re feeling isolated or stressed, reach out to a friend, family member, or therapist for a supportive conversation. Having someone to listen and validate your feelings can be incredibly comforting.
Action: Identify one or two trusted people in your life who you feel comfortable reaching out to. Schedule a call, coffee date, or walk-and-talk as a way to connect and unload some of the holiday stress.
The holidays are an opportunity for connection and joy, but it’s essential to approach them in a way that respects your mental well-being. By setting boundaries, budgeting your energy, and releasing expectations you can create a season that feels good for you. Prioritizing your mental health is one of the best gifts you can give yourself.
