As we kick off a new year, it is only natural to feel the pressure to set big goals and resolutions, with everyone striving to be their “best selves.” But for those who struggle with perfectionism, this can lead to stress, self-doubt, and burnout.
Perfectionism might seem like a strength—it pushes you to aim high and work hard. But it can also hold you back, keeping you stuck in fear of failure and unable to enjoy your accomplishments, always striving for the next best thing.
Therapy can help you break free from perfectionism and find more balance in your life. Instead of aiming for perfection, you’ll learn to focus on progress, practice self-compassion, and find peace with imperfection. It’s better to be present than to be perfect.
Signs Perfectionism Is Holding You Back
Do any of these sound familiar?
- You’re afraid to start something because it might not turn out perfectly.
- You set impossibly high standards for yourself (or others).
- You can always find what went wrong and you often dwell on small mistakes instead of celebrating what went well.
- You feel stuck or procrastinate because the task feels overwhelming.
- You experience frustration, anxiety, or burnout when things don’t go as planned.
If so, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with these feelings—but there’s help!
Finding Self-Compassion with Therapy in Belleville
At The Relationship Centre, we help you break free from the cycle of overachievement and self-doubt, guiding you toward a healthier balance. Learn how to set realistic expectations, prioritize self-care, and embrace your worth. Therapy can help you understand the root causes of your perfectionism. It might stem from childhood experiences, societal pressures, or personal insecurities.
The Relationship Centre offers a supportive, non-judgmental space to explore these influences. Through self-compassion exercises, you’ll learn to:
- Treat yourself with kindness and understanding.
- Challenge your inner critic.
- Embrace imperfection and celebrate progress, no matter how small.
- Find balance and avoid burnout.
Contact our Care Coordinator to get started.
Steps to Overcoming Perfectionism
If you’re ready to approach 2025 differently, here are five actionable steps to help you let go of perfectionism:
Challenge Unrealistic Beliefs:
Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen if this isn’t perfect?” Most of the time, the answer isn’t as bad as it feels in the moment. Allow yourself to show up real and raw after all nobody is perfect!
Celebrate Small Wins:
Notice and celebrate your progress, even if it’s not perfect. Every step forward matters. We tend to overlook our achievements and focus on the negative. Keep a journal and at the end of every day write down 3 things you’re proud of- big or small!
Set Realistic Goals:
Adjust your expectations to match your capacity. Instead of aiming to “perfect” something, aim to improve it gradually. Focus on the step ahead instead of the end result and see what you create in the process.
Practice Imperfection:
Leave something intentionally unfinished or imperfect. Reflect on how it feels to let go of the pressure.
Seek Mental Health Support:
Therapy provides a safe space to unpack your perfectionism, explore its roots, and develop healthier coping tools.
Common Sayings to Catch Yourself & Heal From Perfectionism
Perfectionism has a sneaky way of creeping into your everyday thoughts, shaping how you see yourself, and impacting how you live your life without you even noticing. It’s that little voice pushing you to aim for impossible standards or freaking out about even small mistakes ruminating over them again and again how you could’ve done better. The good news? Once you start spotting these patterns, you can break the cycle and give yourself a break. Here are some common ways perfectionism might be showing up in your day-to-day:
Catch These Thoughts & Reframe Them:
- “If I can’t do it perfectly, it’s not worth doing.”
- “People will judge me if I make a mistake.”
- “I should be doing better than this.”
- “Once I get this perfect, I’ll finally feel okay.”
- “Why can’t I do anything right.”
- “Why is everyone succeeding and I’m not?”
Replace Them With Affirmations:
- “Doing my best is enough.”
- “Mistakes are part of learning and growing.”
- “I’m proud of the effort I’m putting in.”
- “Progress, not perfection, is what matters most.”
- “My worth doesn’t come from what I accomplish.”
Practicing these affirmations can help you reframe your mindset and take the pressure off. Remind yourself: You are enough, just as you are, and your worth isn’t tied to how much you achieve or how perfect things seem. You deserve love, respect, and peace simply because you exist!
The Benefits of Letting Go Of Perfectionism
When you let go of perfectionism, life becomes lighter and more fulfilling. Imagine:
- Feeling free to try new things without fear of failure.
- Enjoying your achievements instead of criticizing them.
- Spending less time worrying and more time connecting with loved ones.
- Building confidence in your ability to handle challenges (even when you make mistakes).
Letting go of perfectionism doesn’t mean you’re giving up on your potential—it means you’re giving yourself the freedom to grow with the worry and added stress.
How Therapy in Belleville Helps You Heal From Perfectionism
At The Relationship Centre in Belleville, our therapists use evidence-based approaches like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to help you overcome perfectionism. Together, we’ll:
- Identify and challenge unhelpful thought patterns.
- Develop self-compassion techniques to quiet your inner critic.
- Build strategies for setting realistic and achievable goals.
The start of a new year doesn’t have to feel overwhelming. It’s time to embrace progress over perfection!
Let’s work together to make 2025 about growth, not flawlessness. Book a consultation today and take the first step toward finding freedom from perfectionism.
Contact our Care Coordinator today for a free consultation.
Book Recommendation from Mary Joan, MSW, RSW, Owner of The Relationship Centre
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown is a must-read for anyone struggling with perfectionism. Brown’s honest and relatable approach shows how letting go of the need to be perfect can lead to a more authentic and fulfilling life. This book helps you embrace who you truly are, instead of focusing on what you think you should be. It’s full of practical advice and encouragement to build self-compassion and live more freely. If you feel weighed down by the pressure to always get it right, this book is a great place to start.
